Hey there,
Over the next few weeks I'm going to be talking about discipling others. As Christians, it is our job to help others; It is our job to disciple others in the faith. We take someone who is younger in the Lord and we encourage and help them. We want to see them grow and become strong, anointed Kingdom workers for Christ. But many times our proteges let us down. They miss church and do things they shouldn't, and many give up and abandon their faith altogether. It can be very discouraging. In fact, if you're going to truly invest yourself in helping others grow in their faith, you better toughen up. Discipling others isn't easy but it is well worth it. Think about your own life and the people who discipled you. Where would you be if they had given up on you when you fell short?
There are going be some great joys and some huge disappointments and no one approach works best, but here are some things that will guide you in your endeavor to build true disciples of Christ.
First, Don't jump off a cliff with them. You've all heard the question, "If your friends jumped off a cliff would you?" There is a good lesson in that question. Many times we become so attached to the people we are trying to help that we follow them over the edge. Our desire to see them do well causes us to go to great lengths to help them and sometimes we go to far.
There was a guy (let's call him Dave) I was trying to help. Dave had a lot of problems and situations to deal with. He had received Christ in his life and I was trying to help him. I had great hopes for Dave and I invested a lot of my time and heart in him. But there was a problem; Dave needed me too much. He kept calling and talking for hours, he needed more help than I could give him, and he was starting to invade my personal and family space. We all need personal time and space. We all need family time and space. When we let others come in and take over we are doing them, ourselves and our families no good.
As I created lines in our relationship that I insisted Dave not cross, Dave became disenchanted with me and upset that I wouldn't go to whatever lengths he thought necessary for him. He wanted me to jump over the cliff with him. Of course this upset me. After all, I had invested much in this man; I had gone beyond the call of duty. I was not pleased with the outcome but there was another scenario that would've been even worse;
If I would've sacrificed my time with God for time with Dave; if I would've sacrificed my personal health, finances, and family for Dave, then I would have become Dave. Dave would have taken my money until I was in need of a loan. Dave would have taken my time until my children needed a father. Dave would have taken my time until I had no time to spend with my wife and with God. Helping others is a wonderful thing but we cannot help others when we allow ourselves to be taken under.
Get this picture. You're out in the ocean with Dave. Both of you are swimming to stay afloat. Dave is starting to sink. What do you do? You help Dave if you can. But what if you grab onto Dave and in a panic he pushes you and himself under the water. You cannot help Dave if you are drowning yourself. That is why you must always keep a healthy foundation in your spirit, health, family and ministry. If you allow others to drag you under then no one is better; no one is helped.
Don't give your money away until your own family needs are not met. Don't give your time away until there is no time for rest or prayer. Don't allow yourself to be pulled into the water, if you do, you will be looking for help. Keep a firm foundation in your life. If you do you will always have your feet in a solid place; a place that is ideal for reaching out and helping others.
Keep up the fight for those people like Dave, they need us, but fight on your own terms. Create boundaries and limitations, after all, you are not God. You can't always be there; you don't have unlimited time and resources.
Next time; Don't jump to conclusions
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